Why I'm fickle about a smack

2013-07-30 09:59

The subject will probably be pushed from pillar to post. We’ll see many annoyed comments, heated debates, not so heated debates… you get the picture…

My parent friends, non parent friends, blogger friends, we are all talking about the proposed “smacking” law.

Speaking from experience, I’ve felt both abuse and discipline, which leaves me sitting on the fence. Fickle I know.

The reason for my arbitrary decision, are as follows;

There is such a thing as discipline, and discipline is a necessary “evil”. Equipped parents know that, your children are at one time or another going to try and push your boundaries. They are going to give it all they have. They want to think that they have the keys to your sanity. They are going to drive your bright pink Masarati at lightning speed round Chapman’s Peak bends; until you are left screaming to get off the roller coaster.

There are going to be moments when your inner Jo Frost flies out the window, and you release one hard wallop on their gluteus maximus. Quite frankly when all else fails, what do you do?

Talking, screaming out of dire frustration, grounding until the next passing of Halley’s Comet; and sending to the naughty corner all have their merits and to be brutally honest, I haven’t had to use the rear end of my two “angels” in a while. My point is that a smack is a means to an end. It’s not abuse; it’s a wake-up-call. Mommy’s had enough now and its time that we give in, hand back the keys to her sanity and BEHAVE!

We certainly do not need to see brightly embossed lines on backsides. That’s where I draw the line. No bruises, no shoving children across rooms, no open sores, no abuse.

We can’t be naïve. We have to realise that there are those out there with the poorest of parenting skills. They’ll over step the mark for sure. They need to be policed. Children’s rights do deserve protection. If I knew better at eight years old and laws for children’s rights were jacked up, I could have ended 20 years worth of scars those visible, mental and emotional. Children are easy targets, as are animals. The little eight year old, threatened version of me, as virtually voiceless; my escape routes were corked permanently with super glue. Finished, klaar, overs kadovers, shut up and “behave” or be kicked, beaten, scared into submission.

This brings me to my conclusion;

Should there be a law to govern the rights of children? Yes

Should there be a law to govern child abuse? Yes

Should there be a law to govern parenting? No, I don’t think so.

If school teachers are equipped, and know their students well enough the abusers will come out of the woodwork. They need to regularly educate children that they have rights and how to exercise them.

The better the bond between a child and a parent, the easier it will be for a child to speak up about what is bothering them. The same works for teachers and pupils. If schools had good teaching practices in place, we wouldn’t need a law to govern a smack.

Licences to become parents in the first place would help immensely too.

Now there’s someone who thinks “ah! she’s gone all bunny hugger and doesn’t have a clue” – well my dear, I do have a clue. Peace is the word…. Not Grease.

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