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Ever get back from a much-needed holiday feeling more tired than you did before you left? Let’s face it, the brain’s constant whirring can be tricky to suppress and setting up an out-of-office doesn’t stop you thinking about emails or your to-do list.
Real calm is hard to find – and it is taking its toll. A recent survey found that 60% of people in the UK are finding it harder to stay positive each day than before the pandemic.
While working from home has its benefits, it has also blurred the boundaries between leisure and work, meaning even when we think we’re relaxing we’re struggling to properly switch off. So it’s more important than ever to take a proper break.
Neuroscientist Dr Tara Swart explains that when our bodies are stressed, even sometimes if when we’re doing nothing, we’re in “fright-and-flight” mode.
“The difference between the non-relaxed mode and the relaxed mode is your stress hormone levels. When cortisol is high, which happens when you’re really focused, switched on, busy or stressed, it prevents your body from going into 'rest-and-repair' mode because it's trying to make sure that you can meet the challenges that you have to meet,” she says.
“That’s why it’s so important that we learn to encourage a switch to recuperation mode, using the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps us rest and digest."
But unsurprisingly, given the turbulent times we've all been through, making this switch has become harder than ever. And while regular yoga classes and a Netflix binge can help in the short-term, most of us rely on an annual holiday to rejuvenate and revive us. So how can we make the most of it?
Dr Swart suggests homing in on each of the five senses in turn to really focus in on what we’re experiencing, rather than multitasking as we’re all guilty of doing.
Here’s how to tap into each of our senses and train our minds to relax more effectively.
SOUND
There’s a reason gentle Zen music is played in spas. Certain sounds, especially those from nature, are scientifically proven to help us relax. Researchers at Brighton and Sussex Medical School have found playing natural sounds affects the body systems that control the flight-or-fright and rest-digest autonomic nervous systems, increasing the resting activity of the brain.
“Sound therapy is a holistic treatment that uses sound, vibration and different frequencies to put you into a deep state of meditation,” says Farzana Ali, founder of sound healing organisation The Sound Therapist.
“We use singing bowls, gongs and drums to generate sounds that wash over you, which is why we call sessions a 'sound bath'. Higher frequencies are the most stimulating and used when someone is feeling stuck or blocked; whereas slower frequencies are calmer and more restful, so perfect for tackling stress and anxiety.
“Sound healing allows your brain to move from a beta-dominant brainwave state (when we’re concentrating, focused or stressed) to a relaxed and restful alpha-dominant brainwave state.
“The sounds you hear also trigger your parasympathetic nervous system, which is the opposite of the flight-or-fight response. Your breathing becomes relaxed and your heart rate slows down too. This all encourages your body to fall into a really deep relaxation. Therapeutic sound work can also improve your sleep, as well as help with pain management and even lower high blood pressure,” adds Ali.
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SIGHT
“Quite often we only see what is right in front of us,” say therapists and authors of Everyday Confidence: Boost your Self-Worth and Build Unshakeable Confidence, Nik and Eva Speakman. “So by expanding our scope of vision and offering an immediate change in focus, we give our minds a distraction which can help us relax.
“Try looking around you at five things you wouldn't usually notice, such as the stitching on your sofa, the curve of the skirting board or direction of the carpet pile. To intensify the experience, close your eyes and imagine observing the intricacy of the face of a loved one, the petals of a flower or the ripples of an ocean.”
Another way to harness this powerful sense is through art therapy. “Very often, art serves a therapeutic function for people because it allows them to experience and understand their own emotions in new ways,” says Sarah Stein Lubrano, designer and faculty member for The School of Life. She recommends looking at these three paintings as a way of resetting our emotions.
SMELL
“The olfactory nerve that runs to the top of your nose is connected to the part of the brain associated with memory and emotion,” explains Dr Swart. “That's why, if I asked you which smell most strongly evokes a childhood memory, the answer will be quite immediate. It’s also why scent is so powerful.
“You can use different scents to create links in your brain between a smell and an activity – an obvious one is lavender which has long been associated with relaxation and sleep. Citrus scents are often used for energising and reviving, and rose for optimism. But due to the links with memory, scent is also deeply personal so it’s about discovering what works for you.”
If you have trouble sleeping, try bath products with sedating vetivert, calming chamomile and grounding sandalwood. The musky, sweet aroma of frankincense has been used for centuries to help relieve anxiety.
TOUCH
There's a reason massages are so relaxing. Skin is the largest organ in our bodies and, as such, is extremely sensitive to external stimuli. One of the fastest routes to relaxation is by warming it up – either in a bath or with the heat of the sun.
Stretching our muscles is also important. According to Prevention.com, “stretching for just a few minutes a day can help you soothe stiff joints, melt away chronic stress, improve sleep and revive energy”.
TASTE
This is the sense we tend to forget when it comes to relaxation – and yet we all know that sugar and caffeine stimulate our system.
For the opposite, try chamomile tea to reduce anxiety; salmon to regulate dopamine; and serotonin, which can have calming and relaxing properties; or dark chocolate, which is both comforting and also contains flavonols, antioxidants that improve blood flow to the brain and therefore promote its ability to adapt to stressful situations.
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While it’s not always good to turn to food for comfort, taste can be a positive distraction we use to help raise our mood, the Speakmans say.
Dr Swart agrees: “I interviewed Deepak Chopra and he taught me the idea of just putting one grain of sugar in your mouth and completely savouring it, imagining the sugarcane field where it came from and how far it has travelled; connecting to that sense in a deep way and understanding the bigger picture of it. That is very relaxing because when you're just focused on that one taste in your mouth, you're not worrying about what went wrong yesterday, or what you're anxious about in the future. You become very present.”
“Breathing more deeply and at a slower pace has been proven to have a number of benefits, including lowering your blood pressure, bringing energy more efficiently into your cells and relaxing tension in your muscles,” says Rebecca Dennis, breathwork expert and author of Let It Go: Breathe Yourself Calm.
“Deep diaphragmatic breathing for a few minutes each day will help reduce anxiety and stress. Conscious breathing improves both your physical and mental health and is a great tool to help handle everyday stresses. Maintaining an awareness of your breath throughout the day can help to quieten the mind and keep you calm.”
Set a timer for five minutes and move into a forward fold, bending your body over, your head towards your knees.
Neuroscientist Dr Tara Swart says holding a position for this length of time will move your body from the sympathetic nervous system, which is fright and flight, to the parasympathetic nervous system, which is rest and digest; and give you the same feeling you get after eating a really nice meal, or waking up from a good night's sleep.
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