Grade 5 girl sends brutal list of 'rules' to boy who has a crush on her


Take a hint, Noah.

As a fifth grader, Zoë believes she's too young to have a boyfriend. And she has no qualms about letting Noah, a boy who has a crush on her, know.

She wrote him a list of intense rules, and made it perfectly clear what will happen if he fails to follow them.

Here are the 7 rules in all their glory:

1. Do not touch my shoulder.

2. Do not get behind me with all that playing + foolishness. (Don't get behind me at all.)

3. Do not speak to me unless it is a greeting, which will be never.

4. Stop playing with me on the bus.

5. I have a short temper with people and you ruin my day because you play 2 much.

6. Reread 500 times

7. You like me (as a gf) but I don't like you (as a bf) I'm 2 young!


And if Noah breaks any of these rules, she'll call her dad, mom's friend, fake mom (yes, her fake mom) and a janitor she knows.

The brutal letter came to light when it was shared on Twitter by user @WhosDenverJones. "My friend who's a 5th grade teacher just sent this to me! I'm dead!!!", she captioned a photo of the letter.
Hopefully Noah took it all in stride.
The post has since amassed over 6000 retweets and more than 10 000 likes.

Read more:

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‘When you die, do I get your stuff?’: Doting dad tweets the hilarious things his daughters say

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