Hilarious story of a man who got his girlfriend ‘pregnant’ in grade 7 – just by holding hands


In a series of hilarious tweets, Twitter user Kiran David shares the story of how when he was in grade 7, he genuinely believed he had impregnated his girlfriend - just by holding hands.

"BEFORE YOU JUDGE THIS STORY JUST A QUICK REMINDER," he claims in his first tweet.

"Romans 3:23."

He admits that although he's ugly, he's "fly cuz I got a British accent".

But his father being a pastor, "sex wasn't even a topic in my house".

"I knew nothing about it except it was for grown ups."

At this point of the story, Kiran and his girlfriend have been dating for a couple of months.

"That's long for middle school. So I was thinking we goin the distance.

"Life is good."

Until one day....

And that's when she dropped the bombshell: she's pregnant.

"I start shaking mad hard. The world stood still."

After his mom makes an appointment with the school principal, Kiran finds himself pacing around his room "tryna figure out where he can work to handle his responsibilities as a father."

"I'm not tryna be a dead beat."

The next morning, the pre-teen wakes up with a game plan.

"In the meeting I'ma just step up to the plate. Handle my business and that will be that. I'm 12."

I'm like "... Wait WHAT"

My mom: WHEN DID YOU HAVE SEX — Kiran David (@NonProphet_) May 22, 2016

She proceeds to explain to me that to get pregnant. Sex has to happen. — Kiran David (@NonProphet_) May 22, 2016

— Kiran David (@NonProphet_) May 22, 2016

And then it clicked.

You don't put no 12 year old through this man. I WENT OFF on everyone man. pic.twitter.com/fURMoG1SOR — Kiran David (@NonProphet_) May 22, 2016

Fortunately, he "didn't get in any trouble. At all".

"Never spoke about it for the rest of that year."

The girl went on to have the baby.

Moral: Ya girl ain't pregnant by you just because she's your girl. Bless up. — Kiran David (@NonProphet_) May 22, 2016

Read more:

Woman busts her boyfriend cheating after hiding in his BOOT – and live tweets the whole thing

‘I am done with boys!’ Adorably angst-ridden diary of a 7-year-old girl becomes a viral sensation

The awful way a man discovered his girlfriend was cheating on him – with his own father

This 14-year-old’s breakup texts are downright brutal

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