What do men want?


Manicure in beauty salon soaking nails spa

What do men want? Like Prince Charming they want Cinderella.

Now that I’ve been on a mate-finding website for nearly nine months the picture is becoming increasingly clear to me – men want women with painted nails.

Don’t ask me why.

More men have responded to my toes than I can . . . well . . . count on my toes. They like well-groomed feet because then the rest will also be well groomed, a man told me. And they like light, bright nail polish. It’s probably more traditionally feminine than black, brown or dark purple.

Attractive, soft hands are always winners, and most men ooh and aah over a French maincure, where the tips are painted white and the rest of the nail is pink. And again I have no idea why.

This one won’t be a surprise – men like breasts, curves and attractive underwear. And remember, if you want to seduce a man or be two steps ahead of him, wear a sexy shirt or dress that shows off your curves because that’s what men see when sitting opposite you at a table.

Men also seem to like dresses more than they like pants. It’s probably the feminine thing again. That suits me too because I look slimmer in a dress than in pants. I have been out with men who notice if my eyebrows have been recently plucked. Men are more observant than you would think. As some women measure men superficially by the cars they drive, there are men who measure women by their appearance – and their care of it.

The other day I was reading a blog by a woman who’s also on a mate-finding website. She complained that maintaining a well-groomed appearance was expensive. She’s right. It’s hair and nails and clothes and perhaps even going to gym. Is that unfair? Not necessarily.

It’s often men who have to pay during a date. And women measure men by their status and income and ability to care for them. A man with a small bank balance is as much of a poor investment to many women as a large woman is to some men. They may be shallow but it’s a reality – poor men and overweight woman aren’t going to be overwhelmed by dates.

Speaking of overweight; I’m not slim and find that men like curves. And more men like intelligence than you’d think – provided you’re not more intelligent than them. If you are they lose interest as fast as you can say “IQ”.

The biggest surprise is how many men are apparently longing for love. They want someone to complement and fulfill them, particularly the older men who’ve been through a divorce or two.

Because behind the nails and dress and curves there beats a heart – and that’s what everyone is looking for.


Erla-Mari Diedericks is the author of the book Sin, Sushi & Survival and her latest novel, Still Standing, is now available in shops countrywide as well as at kalahari.com. She also offers online writing courses. Click here for more information.

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