‘I’m a foster girlfriend – here’s how to know if you’re one too’

Jana Hocking. (Photo: Instagram/@
Jana Hocking. (Photo: Instagram/@ jana_hocking)

She was tossing and turning in bed one night when her mind drifted to all her past relationships.

Jana Hocking grabbed her cellphone from the bedside table and shamelessly started stalking each of her ex-boyfriends on Instagram.

“They were all now married with children,” she recalls.

“Yup, the boy who broke my heart after high school. The farmer with the restless energy too. Heck! Even the guy I dated last year for a red-hot minute.”

Suddenly it hit her: she was their foster girlfriend.

According to Urban Dictionary, a foster girlfriend is a woman men date until they find the partner with whom they want to spend the rest of their lives. A foster girlfriend, according to the online dictionary, is also a woman who intentionally doesn’t want to be with a man long-term.

Jana (34) is both. In other words, she’s a foster girlfriend by choice.

She’s been single for the past seven years “but in actual fact I’ve just hopped from one mini-kinda-sorta relationship to the next [sic]”.

So she decided to conduct a little investigation into her foster girlfriend status, writes news.com.au. “To start with, I looked at my lifestyle,” she says.

“It could be argued that I’m terrible at texting. I don’t have much time for dating if I’m snowed under with work, I can’t stand it when a guy stays over and then wants to spend the rest of the day with me. And I enjoy the cute cuddly part of the relationship minus the responsibilities.”

View this post on Instagram

My new ‘type’ is sanitised.

A post shared by Jana Hocking ?? (@jana_hocking) on

Does the evidence confirming Jana’s foster girlfriend status resonate with you?

Well, the Australian radio DJ has compiled a checklist to help you identify whether you fit into the same category. See if you agree with any of these.

  • You reply to text messages hours later or fail to call back after a date;
  • You enjoy sex with them but avoid the after-cuddles as far as possible (you’d also prefer that they don’t spend the night);
  • You enjoy your own company and space but like the odd date here and there;
  • You avoid discussions about long-term plans together;
  • You don’t spend a lot of money on dates; and
  • You don’t necessarily care whether you look your best on the date.


We live in a world where facts and fiction get blurred
In times of uncertainty you need journalism you can trust. For 14 free days, you can have access to a world of in-depth analyses, investigative journalism, top opinions and a range of features. Journalism strengthens democracy. Invest in the future today. Thereafter you will be billed R75 per month. You can cancel anytime and if you cancel within 14 days you won't be billed. 
Subscribe to News24
Read your favourite magazine in a convenient PDF form.
Read now